What did the lawyer say to a lawyer? We're both lawyers.

When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

Whats better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics????? NOT BEING RETARDED!!!!!!!

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

what is the difference between the black orphan and the white orphan.... the black orphan died after i raped it

What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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