Three men walked into a bar. None were injured because they were all wearing hard hats as is the procedure for a construction site.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

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Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period. Damnit, ignore that.

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what did meredith and nick have in common an i

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Why did the 10-year-old boy get on the computer? He had to finish a project for Social Studies, and it was due the next day.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin.

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What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

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Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

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"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

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Women's rights.

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I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

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How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

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A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

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A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

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two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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