A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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Whats better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics????? NOT BEING RETARDED!!!!!!!

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

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Carl has 300 candy bars. He eats 295. What does Carl have? Diabetes. Carl has diabetes.

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What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

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You know how I felt about Nero, no way id ever date anyone but you, back then that is. Fine I will come along, I bet you left the base at "point zero" without the information he left, you have not changed a bit Seth, always too impulsive for your own good, but Nero was always like that and that, turned out, well damn. Tell me first, if you come get me, how much have you really changed mentally from the last time we met? You sincerely sound like a psychopath and I could use a shoulder to cry on rather than be escorted to some sick torture dungeon thing. I gather you are not far away, could you please get over here asap? I do not care about more than the standard code anymore, you have not changed much, except you are a deranged psychopath now, I get it, in your place I think id do the same, I have no idea how bad Nero was doing when you found him, and I sure as hell dont want to know.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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how do you know when your in love? massive erection.

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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How do you make a mime cry? Hit him with an axe

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Whats worst then finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaus.

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I remember my grandfather's last words he said to me before he kicked the bucket...."Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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whats purple and brown lucozade sport

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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