what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

A man walks into a bar He drinks the night away with his friends *Plot Twist* It was a dream He has no friends.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? There aren't pineapples in the ocean.

What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

how do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker face

What do you call a muslim who is not a terrorist ? A muslim

Why did the Negro say no to the Aryan? It doesnt matter what he said! thats racist!

Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

John: I just ran over a cat... Just kidding! It was your mum.

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

what do u call a fat guy in a pool u

What did the sun say to the moon ?? Nothing - they can't speak

Why did Lisa let go of the monkey bars? she was being molested

Your mother is so fat she has made a concerted effort to loose weight and lead a healthier lifestyle

Why did the maths book commit suicide? It wanted to be history

What is the funniest joke in the world? Written.

Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

There was once a man who went to the store and walked across a bridge and bought toothpaste and yelled at a hobo and went home and took a nap and then he went back to the park where he talked to an english teacher who told him not to use run-on sentences or she would slap him with a fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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