What do you call a man with cheese on his face? His name is David.

Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

What did the devout Catholic man say to his gay neighbours who just got married? "Congratulations!"

Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

17

What liquid is white and sticky and annoying to get on your hand? Glue.

a man checks his mypsace

Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

"Lady's and Gentlemen, hobos and trams Cross side mosquitoes and bald legged ants Pull up a chair and sit on the floor and I'll tell you I've never heard before Of one bright day in the middle of night Two dead boys got up to fight Back to Back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other A deaf policeman heard the noise Came and killed the two dead boys If you don't believe this lie is true Ask the blind man he saw it too"

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

Yo mama is so fat she could be a plus size model because she's big and hot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

Alex Gedrose.

A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

4 men walk into a bar... Don't jump to conclusions! They were gay.

Jumping out of an airplane is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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