What did Mr. Sandman do whrn the boy asked for one too many dreams, nothing because Mr. Sandman was the boys bitch.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

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Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

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What's worse than getting a flat tire on a date? getting one while rushing your dying grandfather to the hospital.

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What did the peanut say to the jelly

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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a man walks into a bar and it hurts

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

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What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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Pete and Repeat were in a boat, Pete jumped out. Repeat was concerned-not only because his name was typically used as a verb and not something parents normally name a baby, but about why Pete would jump out of the boat? Pete wondered what to do next-should he jump in and see if Pete is okay? He also wondered if he should he change his name to Kevin.

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A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

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why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he could. Did it workout? NO

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When do you know when to stop making anti- jokes? when your done with your joke and click submit.

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Hahahahaha your nan had HIV and died.lol

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Why was the washing machine laughing? Because you're on drugs.

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A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

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this site is an antijoke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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