What did the muffin say to the cup cake? nothing, muffins can't talk, and cup cakes can't hear.

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What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

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A women frantically calls the doctor and says, " Doctor, doctor, give me the news! I have a bad case of loving you."

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How do you drown a fish? You don't...

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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womens rights

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

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How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

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What do an elephant and a plum have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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what do you call a black man driving a police car? a cop

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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I once met with Mahatma Gandhi and he said to me "Child, why do I walk this earth?.. What is the meaning of my living?.. Why am I alive?" and I bowed in respect of his wisdom and said "I don't know. Why do you?" and he said "I don't I'm dead."

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

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Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

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Luke Hardie is G@Y

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69, Is funny because the numbers are backwards

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what's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? they have different colored hair

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven had a huge ass mole

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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