When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh no! Someone's been murdered in my garden!

What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

Have you ever listened to the smell of the color 9? It tastes like freedom!

Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

How do you prank a blind man? Uou leave the plunger in the toilet.

Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

What did he African say when he had diarrhea? Shit

John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

Women's rights.

Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

Why did the blonde commit suicide? Because she hated her life.

What is the difference between a girl and a woman? Age

I hate it when I get an erection and it pushes Pluto out of orbit.

Q: what do u call a hotdog that's not cooked? A:a raw hot dog

you first

What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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