I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey

What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

What's the difference between a duck?

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

A Man Walks Into A Bar. He's Immediately Rushed To The Hospital.

why did the chicken cross the road? he didn't make it

what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Give me time to think of a joke hm..............hm.................hm....................hm....................mmm....................hm?..........................m m.....................mmmmm..............hm...................hm.....................hm......................... ah!i don't want to think of a joke

What is Soulja Boy's favorite letter? I don't know. You go ask him.

Slam! Slam! Slam! I'm a woodpecker. Slam! Slam! Slam! Except with dirt.

Im batman...suck it losers

Q: What has the exact same colors as the gay flag but are sometimes hilarious? A: Clowns.

Whoever just posted that suicide shit is stupid, you can get arrested for that shit. I would delete it.

Q: Why did George Lopez walk into a Taco Bell? A: To purchase a 5-layer Gordita Burrito

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually, no they're not. They're VIOLET. That's why they're called that. If they were blue, they would be called "Blues", or something of a similar nature. Don't be dumb.

A Mexican, a black guy, and a Muslim are riding in the back of a car. Who is driving? Their friend Keith.

Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

I just drank a cola.

How do you make a businessman cry? Shoot him in the kneecaps.

What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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