Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

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why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

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The man asks the blind man "where ya going"b The Blind man replies "i dont know".

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

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What do you call a Black person in a city with high crime rates? Whatever their name happens to be.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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What do you call a bad anti joke? And anti joke

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

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Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

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24... wait i thought of something better than 24... let me hear it... 25!!!!

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Why did the Gazelle run away. Because a lion was nearby and as we all know, nature called for the lion to be a carnivore, so the gazelle is in danger of being consumed by the lion.

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What did the fly say to the frog? Nothing, insects can't talk.

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oh my god! what? i heard this joke the other day and it was hilarious. ok, tell me? actually it doesn't matter i can't remember anyway.

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Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs and an eyepatch? names...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What does a joke and an anti-joke have in common? Nothing, since "anti-" refers to the opposite of the word that it is modifying.

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Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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