If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock Knock Who's There Your doctor... You have Aids

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What is 1 inch long and eats everyone in it's way .... my pet fish

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the boy depressed? A. because his whole family was slaughtered on the kitchen floor.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One holds groceries and the other molests little children.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

thumb_up thumb_down -29

split your ass cheek

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What is my name? I dont know

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, nobody could fit inside a pineapple, nor could a pineapple survive in the sea

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what happens when an Indian walks into a bar? they realize they found there way home

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I agree

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: Were did suzy go after the explosion? A: Everywere

thumb_up thumb_down -33

hi jonny

thumb_up thumb_down -33

How many fingers do most people have? 10

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Alternate ending for children: Despite the massive trauma that the spider suffered from his fall and the sheer volume of rain in the confined space of a pipe, it made a miraculous recover due to the sun coming out. It was however, forever doomed to repeat this cycle of undeath for ever more. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops