What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

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how many jews can you fit in a volkswagon? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 6 million in the ash trey.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What do you call a black man who has been killed? A dead person.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police your son died in a car crash.

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How can you tell if a joke is skept? Tell it to raysean and see if he laughs

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Roses are red violets are flowers jordan and me did it for hours If you know what i mean xxx

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why did the chicken cross the road? becasue he wanted to. also he didnt want to be involved in the holocost

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

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My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Apple juice.

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What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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your mom is so stupid she has a low iq

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I went to the doctor and explained to him, "My penis fell off." The doctor gives me an odd look, and then chops his off to make me feel better.

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whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

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from south park what do u call a jew on a rope no one ever said the answer, so my answer is a jew on a rope.

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A nhiger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nhigers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nhiger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nhiger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nhiger go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nhiger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nhiger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nhiger ,smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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Steven Hawkin ran a marathon.

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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