Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Why did the boy tell the fly to eat the cheese? A: because he wanted him to

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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One time at band camp, I advanced my clarinet skill, which led me to have a good life.

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Why does Santa Clause eat cookies? Because cookies not part of a balanced diet.

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An Irish man walks past a bar... it could happen...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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So a moose, a deer, and a horse walk into a bar. One of the people at the bar was a hunter who was carrying his gun. Several people got up and left after they realized the potential danger of the situation.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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Why did the police arrest the Escalade full of black men? Reckless driving. I lied, it was an asian woman.

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

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What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

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A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops