What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

TWIX PAUSE!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you help a chronic drug addict? Buy him or her more drugs. They NEED it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

thumb_up thumb_down +21

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you get a n***r out of a tree? Cut the rope

thumb_up thumb_down +21

OBAMA and the DEMOCRATS

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Bacon is delcious.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a man that has to go to the bathroom do when there is no restroom within a reasonable walking radius? He gets in his car and drives to the nearest rest stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you tell if a girl is pregant? Stick a banana up her vagina pull it out and see if it has a bite on it

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what do you call a Nice Nazi A Nazi... He's still a Nazi.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

children of those parents which re childless, often are childless too...

thumb_up thumb_down +21

If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops