Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms or legs.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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Your mom is so fat that she should watch her weight and maintain a healthy diet.

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What do you call a Mexican? Whatever his name is you racist.

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What's funnier than the pope in a speedo? Humor is subjective, so answers vary from person to person.

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How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

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What's worse than seeing Levi naked? Cancer.

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Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

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So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

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What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

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What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

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Caller: Is your fridge running! Callee: ... umm yes? Caller: I guess you don't need my services. Thanks Callee: ok bye

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"Have you guys ever seen Derrek Ashmores sisters? They are DTF if you know what I mean" - Jesse Ziegenbein

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Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

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What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

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It is true that Trump will make America great again.

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Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

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How did the polar bear get the bottle of coke? He killed the little boy

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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What did one gothic person say to another gothic person? Nothing. Gothic people only cut themselves.

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anti-joke.com

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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