Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

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What lumpy and pointy? A horny woman with breast cancer

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What's the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? I'll eat Megan Fox before I fuck her.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Bananas can't talk.

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So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

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Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

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Here's a joke, a black man walks into a store and buys something. that's it.

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Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

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A woman leaves the kitchen.

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Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

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If your scared of paedophiles..... grow up

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What happened when the ugly girl asked her crush out on a date? He said yes. He found her personality quite attractive

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There's a god, just kidding.

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The dinosaurs aren't really extinct. Just kidding.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

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Man: Want to hear an anti joke? Woman: ok Man: Why did the the girl fall off her bike? Woman: I don't know. Man: She got hit by a refrigerator. Woman: ok

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a yacht. Unfortunately the yacht is in a shop and all 3 of them sustain injuries following impact with the concrete floor.

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3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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