I scream. You scream. We all scream. Because there is a rapist in the room.

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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Why did the pony go to the Doctor's? It had Horse AIDS.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

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Why did the man dig his nose? because everyone digs their nose

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What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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Wat do u call black circus clwon a bad comedian

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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How old is your mom Dead

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The ULTIMATE Street Fighter shotokan safety guide one Turbo masters tournament X Revenge Kombat Super Ultimate Alpha Omega F*** Y** Edition! 1. I case an attack breaks both your legs, use your last remaining strength in order to kick the air with one leg, while keeping the other one straight down, then immediatedly yell MYLEGSARBROKEN! In order to receive medical attention. And please remember: If Hadou can, then you Sure can! 2. DLC ONLY 3 DLC ONLY 4. DLC Only. ...hayball rolls trough... 9001: DLC only

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What do you call a black man repairing a car? A mechanic who has worked very hard to gain his qualifiaction.

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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Teacher- And that is why the Pythagorean theorem only works for RIGHT triangles. Any questions? Student- I like grapes.

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What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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world peace

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What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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A man walks into a bar.

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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