whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

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Q: What do you call a black guy with his degree in dentistry? A: Doctor

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

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What's worse than AIDS? Not getting your sandwich.

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

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What did the one stethoscope say to the other stethoscope? Nothing. Stethoscopes can't talk.

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what is better than your entire family getting brutally murdered applesauce

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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How do u make a fat person cry......... tell em mc donnalds is closed (^_^)

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Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

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69 :)

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

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say cheese

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dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

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What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops