Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

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Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

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Vicky is my best friend.

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Whats worse than getting punched in the balls? Getting punched in the balls twice.

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Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

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what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

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Whats 2+1? 2.

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What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

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What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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Whats as flat as a pancake and alive Ya nan being flattened by a truck on the motorway

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus !

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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