You have Aids. April fools! you have super Aids.

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A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

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What do you call a man with a gun? An accident waiting to happen.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

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Why was the dog crying? Do dogs even cry?

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A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

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VAGINA.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead.

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

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What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

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Lil' Johnny was happily swinging on the swings when all of a sudden...... ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> FLYING DAGGERS!!!

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where does someone with one leg work? -no where this is a recession

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Guess what? I like trains.

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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roses are red, violets are blue.

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what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

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Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

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What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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