How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

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Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

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Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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Q: What did the priest say to the small child. A: Rite?

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So I says to the guy "take the money and run." He then takes my money and walks down the street.

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Why did the boy tell the fly to eat the cheese? A: because he wanted him to

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how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

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A cat walks into a bar. What's the first thing it says? Absolutely nothing. It was knocked out.

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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An Irish man walks past a bar... it could happen...

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? because he got ran over by a bus! (not a original, just funny)

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The Grinch stole Christmas, he accidentally dropped it and Christmas was ruined for everyone life sucked -shane,Adam,David and Riley go cry about it

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? You've already seen this joke at least SIXTY TIMES on this website, so you already know.

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

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A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

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What do you get if you cross a nan and a car? A squashed dead nan who released their bowels and your grandads face who was also dead as they had a cardiac arrest

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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When life gives you lemmons Give lemmons Life

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How did the Jew escape the concentration camp?

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Knock knock Who's there? April April who? April fools

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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