why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

What's green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A pool table in a tree

What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

Why did the man smell like french toast? His wife previously made him a plate of it that he ate before walking out of the house.

Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

JAmie stegman loves making love with his sister... he loves inbreeds so much

How are a dead chicken and a woman alike? They both belong in the kitchen

a man walks into a bar and has a drink james

Wigan.

a man says "whats shakin bakin" to a friend, but his friend was shaking, because he often has seizures... thats what was shakin

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

A father was angry at his daughter's boyfriend because he took her virginity. The boyfriend said he was ashamed that he never told her he has AIDS.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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