why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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what do you call a homeless man? poor.

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

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What did hitler say to Osama Bin Laden? Nothing they were born at different times

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Why didnt your daughter come home? The door was locked

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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You're mother is so retarded that I probably shouldn't be making fun of her because it would be considered discriminatory.

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Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

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My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

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What happened to the boy who spilled his fruit punch on the president? He was offered a new one compliments of Obama himself.

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Yo mama is so ugly that the devil warships her.

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

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What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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Jokes Ki Duniya

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Easter? Hepatitis.

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Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

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Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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