Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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Q: Whats black, white and red all over? A: not me

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what do you call a prostitute with AIDS? Most likely her first name, unless of course you know her and it is normal for you to refer to her by a nickname or some shorter version of her proper first name.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: I'm a horse. We have long faces.

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There was this land of cheerios. The regular cheerios were the poor ones, the honey nut cheerios were middle class but loved to party, and the frosted cheerios were very wealthy. So there was a young regular cheerio named paul who really had a crush on this frosted cheerio girl named sophia. He liked her so much, that he finally got the courage to ask her out. Shyly he asked her "do you want to go to prom with me" she said "no i only date frosted cheerios". Paul understood and went back to his house dissapointed. The next day Paul went to the doctor and he asked for an operation to make him a frosted cheerio. Since he wasn't very wealthy he could only afford an opperation that would make him a half cheerio. He decided it will do. The next day he approched sophia and asked "will you go to prom with me now" she said "sorry i only date full frosted cheerios" The next day paul went back to the doctor and convinced his parents to lend him some money to become a full frosted, so thats what he did. The next day he asked her out and she finnally said yes. A few days later they went to the prom together that was hosted by the honey nut cheerios. Sophia asked paul for some brownies so paul said sure and waited on the brownie line for quite a long time. He brought her the brownie and thought he was very nice for waiting on line for so long. Then she asked for some fruit punch. Paul looked around and around, until he realized there was no punch line.

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Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

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What do you get if you cross if you cross an overweight woman with a pair of very tight trousers? Exactly that, an overweight woman in inappropriately tight torusers.

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Suppose an American, an Indian, a dinosaur, and a leprechaun are on a plane together. Which one would be the first to chug a 7 pound bottle of coke? The situation is too unlikely, with the odds of it occurring being less than 1%, therefore the question cannot be answered accurately.

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How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

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man: hey whats that in the corner? Bartender: thatssteve his wife left him and he is trying to drown his saddness is addiction.

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roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

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There's two Cherys in a bath one chery asks the other one to pass the soap the other chery said what do I look like, a typewriter?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? .

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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Why was the boy wearing pyjamas? It was his bed time.

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What's worse than being a ginger? Being a soulless ginger

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everyone dislike this

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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