how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

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Siete inglesi quindi non sapete nemmeno cosa c'è scritto ? Succhiacapre che non siete altro.

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I hate blackniggers

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Q: Why did the purple cantalope eat the curtains at midnight? A: Sassafrass.

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Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

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Why didn't Superman save anyone on September 11? He was in a wheelchair.

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69

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It's The Only Crayon The illustrator had?

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When I eat Mi Familia Mexica food, it burns when I go to the bathroom. Is that bad?

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what did hulk say when he was mad? im mad

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How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

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Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

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"Is the Pope a Catholic?" Yes.

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Y- You O- are L- such a O- Loser

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Kids are cheering about the confetti at a birthday party, the mom says the twin towers just collapsed.

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What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Women's Rights

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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How do you kill a bolonde? You have her/him do an algebra problem.

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops