Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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a woman votes!

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What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

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Anti-Joke Memes Are Obviously Not A Thing

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Q: why cant elvis draw a picture. A: cause hes dead.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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P1: knock knock P2: go away!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there?

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A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

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What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

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Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

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What did the boy dog say to the girl dog? Ruff

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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How do you piss of camon? Have sex with shelby!

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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what's the black mans shirt made out of? cotton

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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I saw a "Baby on Board" bumper sticker on a car TARGET AQUIRED

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knock knock who's there ?? the police now get out !!

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what did the church group do at their picnic? drink the kool aid

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Why did the gang jump a man for his blue jeep? Answer The gang wanted a blue jeep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops