Mitt Romney

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Not Madeleine McCann.

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Latvian guy said to the other latvian guy: ''Why did the chicken cross the road?'' The other latvian guy responded: ''In truth, i do not know. I have not seen chicken in 10 years. The last time was before the red army plundered my village. I can still hear all the screams from the women being raped. But, back to question. Where is this chicken you speak of? I have not eaten in days and my wife and children are close to starvation aswell''

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What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple that got hit by a bus.

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If you were a booger..................... I would get a tissue so i could blow my nose.

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What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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What's worse than kissy face pictures on facebook? The porn pictures on facebook.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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women's rights

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What do you call a bird with no wings? Dead

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have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he....

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My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

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How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

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What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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