Come on children, don't dawdle.

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What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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Knock Knock whose there YOUR MOM

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Your mom is so fat she should probably go to her doctor and ask for a prescription of diabetic pills

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A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your heart.

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Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

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Q:Whats funnier than 24? A: 25.

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what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

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How did the old man feel when he couldn't have sex? Viagravated

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Was in a coma, survived trough smoke and mirrors, and I had 3 separated sections of my order in order to test the efficiency of my words, united we are about 6.800.000 people. Excuse my anger below, I mean I was in a coma and ended up on some hard painkillers, and while I am still tapering down on a "totally medicinally safe" dosage of 20 mg valium its a bitch, even for a guy that enjoys a mild painkiller every now and then in order to focus. Excuse my excessive typing, its paincontrol vs the stress and all 64 side effects of valium. I am alive, and my followers know that, I do not mean to brag, but Neronism tends to end up fucked up when I am gone with people trying to live up to what only I can do apparently, so I decided it was time to mash the separate groups together... Btw, we live at point zero now, if you do not know where that is, I can inform you at later time. But be quick about it if you have more questions, we only chat on horsehead due the "discussed hours"

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Why did the Asian eat so much rice? Because he was hungry.

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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Q: How do you make babies cry? A: Throw a brick at it's face.

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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What happends to a monkey without arms.. He bleeds..

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roses are red, violets are violet.

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roses are red and violets are in fact violet

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How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

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a duck walks into a restraunt.and the waiter asks "what would you like?" a quacker (like cracker)

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What is the difference between a baby and a log? I don't have a log in my fireplace

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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