Q: What happens when you sit in the middle of the road? A: You get hit by a car and die a horrible death as your family members mourn in the loss and remain sad forever.

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

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A bald guy walks out of a bar Prostate cancer

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How do you define an unsatisfactory kitchen? It won't have a woman chained to the oven.

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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You're flying above the Kansas Ocean, you lose your brakes and have to paddle all the way to shore. How many dogs can you fit on a carousel? Blue, because Ice Cream is cold.

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What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

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How are a black man, a hispanic man, and a chinese man similar? Believe it or not they all love cantaloupe!

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What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

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What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

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I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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what do you throw at a mexican man when he is drowning? his family.

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Why did the mexican cross the road? His drugs were on the other side.

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Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

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you and your family will die tonight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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