An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What made the lady dance? Bandz!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock We aren't home Sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why are black people so tall? Jesus was also black and therefore gives black people some favorable traits.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the black man cry? He was grieving the death of his brother C.D

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did Moses cross the road? He wanted to play Xbox with his friend Jeff. Moses was a 12 year old boy from California.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A- knock knock B- whose there? A- Chuck Norris B- chuck norris who? A- are you retarded?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats the difference between a 100 dead babies and a ferrari? One is an automobile and the other is a tragic reminder that SIDS is a serious and deadly problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick

thumb_up thumb_down -6

hi anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man walks in on his wife blowing Bubbles. Two weeks later they are divorced.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a blonde with a Doctorate in Physics? Doctor (Dr).

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why does the easter bunny hide his eggs? Because he wants to hide the fact he knocked up a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A:I like your shoelaces!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops