Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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YO FACE

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So a 12 year old suicide bomber walks in to a military base and kills 31 soldiers. It happened. Look it up.

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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A man and his horse walk into a bar, he is told to leave because animals are not allowed on the property

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What's 9+ 10?! 19

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why was the little girl crying in her dads arms? Because he was strangling her

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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Knock Knock. Who'se there? It's Dave. Dave who? Um, you invited me over here. Open the damn door.

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How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? You don't, the giraffe is a savanah animals and there is no physical way for a giraffe to fit in a refridgerator.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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what is so fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? There is a high possibility their breasts have developed, thus equaling more pleasure for you.

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Why was the little boy afraid of Mr.Clean? Because he reminded him of his father who was an alcoholic and used to beat him savagely.

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What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

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Knock Knock! Come in the door is unlocked. I have cookies!

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three peanuts where walking down a dark alley, one was asalted

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How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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