roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

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As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

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Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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A: If you were stranded on an island and you could only have one thin, what would it be? B: A boat A: That makes sense

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Faces like yours belong in the Zoo. Don't be mad I will be there too. Not in the gate but laughing at you.

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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