Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

"What's uhhh.". "Crap I forget" "Oh yeah! 32!"

How do black men eat chicken? Chicken goes in bone come out.

Why did the man with every known fatal disease die? Old age.

Your mum is so dead, when I kick her she doesn't move.

Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

dick dick dick... frogs

Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the moon. It burnt up on re-entry

Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

Your mom is so fat, she got obese and died.

A baby seal walks into a club. It was a tragedy.

Why did the man buy fruits at the store? Because they were available, on sale, and the man was hungry, so he wanted to eat fruit at that time, he then got into his car, but thought to himself first, "I should unlock my car so I can open the door," so he does so, and sits in the drivers seat eating his fruit, he drives off to his home, arrives safely, and greets his family as he enters the house, then they sit down, eat dinner, and go to sleep, the next day, the man goes to the store, and buys vegetables

What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The Hollocaust. What's worse than the Hollocaust? 3 bee stings.

Loner.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar and the bar says "ouch!"

a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

What did the frog order at McDonalds? Nothing, it's a frog.

Your mother is average.

a seal walks into a club.

A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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