What did the little boy ask for for Christmas? A new brain, as he has a malignant tumor, he died.

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How do u make a hockey player cry You Kill his entire family

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Roses are red, Bacon is red, Poems are hard, Bacon

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A black guy walks into a bar. He falls unconscious and an ambulance is quickly called to bring him to the hospital.

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Around 10PM on a Saturday two Irishmen walk into a bar. They order up a round of drinks, and comment on the appearance of several women in the place whom they believe to be single. After finishing up their drinks, the one Irishman asks the other if he'd like another one. The other says no, that he promised his wife he'd be back soon with diapers for the baby. He thanks his friend for the drink and leaves for home. The remaining Irishman orders up another "round" from the bartender, but really it's only one drink he is ordering, being he is only one person.

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A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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In Soviet Russia... People Die for Voicing their Opinions

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a mexecan guy walks in a bar he ask how much is a beer.its $400 and 55'.WHAT THATS SUCKSISH.no i just like to joke its 1 dollor.oh.....shut up go walk in a bra!!!!

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thre guys walk into a bar then goes to sit at a booth and the three guys have to go to the bathroom so they ask a waiter to safe they booth while they go to the bathroom 30 min later and they are still not back so the waiter goes by the door and one guy come out and the waiter asks " what were you doing" and the guy says " blowing bubbles " then goes and sit down " then the second guy come out and the waiter asks " what were you doing " and the guy says " blowing bubbles" and goes and sits down then the last guy come out and the waiter says " let me guess blowing bubble " the guy says back "no i am bubbles "

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Wanna know what's funny? A joke.

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Q. When you drink two 5 hour energies, do you get 10 hours of energy or double the energy for 5 hours? A. You die

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hahah there are so funny that they are so funny that they are so litteral that i make my self make other people laugh so that they poop

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how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

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Anders Lungren is a worthless peice of scrub

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Who wants $300? Me too.

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So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

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knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

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How did the blind man end up in the hospital? He didnt see the bus coming.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Realising the apple is the worm...

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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? It would probably be the court janitor who was responsible for that job, rather than the lawyers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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