Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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sharks

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Why did the baby cry? His dad was holding him upside down over a fire.

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What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

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What did the giraffe say to the other? nothing giraffes cant talk

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem is random Microwave

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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Q: What do you call the first black guy who swam in the ocean? A: Triangle.

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Why did the man with every known fatal disease die? Old age.

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I may have alzheimer's but at least I don't have alzheimer's.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at the piano? Because he is dead.

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Two birds fly onto a bench. They cherp 3 times and sit there enjoying the nice weather.

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Why did the loser end up in hospital? Because he was smoking glue.

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"It's a blimp, it's a hot air balloon!" "No wait, it's your mom."

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BIG PENIS

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Have you ever ate a donut? Yes I have. In fact, the donut I ate recently was fairly delicious.

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A chicken walks into a barn.

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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Q: What do you call a person up to their elbows in a horse's ass? A: An Amish auto mechanic. (this gem brought to you by Designated Dale)

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong is an astronaut. Michael Jackson abuses little kids.

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Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

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A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops