What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you get when you mix a dog with a pool table? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Instead of throwing out his garbage, a young boy decided to play a prank on some passersby and left a banana peel on the sidewalk. moments later an elderly woman walked past and slipped on the banana, falling backwards and smashing her head. The young man watched from the bushes as paramedics shook their heads and placed a now lifeless body in a body bag and took it away. The young boy, startled and shocked at what he just saw, tried to run away, but slipped on his own banana peel, falling backwards onto the pavement. The young boy was lucky and survived, but later had to go to therapy for many years to come, the thought of his prank gone wrong torturing him until he took his own life. What is the moral of the story? Do not litter, ALWAYS throw out your garbage.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

hi will

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the kindergarten teacher crying? a child had just choked to death

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did little Suzy fall of the Swing? Someone threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the difference between a dog and God? A dog is physical living creature while God is a supernatural being.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Stephen Walking hawks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a turtle and a fish? Turtles aren't fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what is blue purple and has wings what i dont know that why i am asking you

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why did the little Canadian girl start crying ? A: Because her mum through a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

thumb_up thumb_down -3

My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

thumb_up thumb_down -3

penis

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops