What s the difference between a pigeon ?

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

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We live in a world.... Yeah its called Earth.

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What did the priest say to the little boy? "Reading antijokes in rapid succession takes almost all humor from them."

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A woman catches her husband cheating on her she divorces him in a rather lengthy sequence of meetings in court

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How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

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How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

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Around 10PM on a Saturday two Irishmen walk into a bar. They order up a round of drinks, and comment on the appearance of several women in the place whom they believe to be single. After finishing up their drinks, the one Irishman asks the other if he'd like another one. The other says no, that he promised his wife he'd be back soon with diapers for the baby. He thanks his friend for the drink and leaves for home. The remaining Irishman orders up another "round" from the bartender, but really it's only one drink he is ordering, being he is only one person.

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when your cable is on the fritz, you play video games instead. when you play video games, you get good. when you get good, you go to COD XP. when you go to COD XP, you lose to whiteboy 7th st. when you lose to whiteboy 7th st., you get into Skyrim. when you get into skyrim, you reenact cut scenes from skyrim. and when you reenact cut scenes from skyrim... ...you take an arrow to the knee... ...don't take an arrow to the knee. Get rid of cable.

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what do you call a pond filled with frogs having sex with bacteria is burning there insides while a midget with assburgers is chanting "SMACK THAT BADONKADONK!" racism..

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Roses are red violets are blue I think you re stupid go eat a shoe

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What did one manicotti say to the other manicotti? I doubt we'll ever know.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Violet, Not Blue, Kill yourself.

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What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

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How do the Kardashians change a light bulb? They buy a new mansion

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers? To get to the other side.

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Wife says to husband, who works is programmer, "Honey get out of bed there is a bug in the bed". Husband says "ok."

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How did the blind man end up in the hospital? He didnt see the bus coming.

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Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

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A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

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look this kid up on facebook and spam him!! its funny, Josh Noonan, also his cell number is 603 560 3399....

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What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

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Yo mama is so fat , she died of a heart condition

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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