Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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What's cooler than living on the sun? Everything, because the sun is the hottest entity in the entire universe. Plus, who'd want to live on the sun?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Meals on wheels - eat up!

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What do you call a girl with 1 eye and 3 arms... Chernobyl.

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Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

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What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

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Why did the girl get robbed? Because her door was unlocked.

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who is gay and sits next to me in my architecture class? James and austin!!!!

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What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

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Justin's humor

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What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

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If you were expecting an antijoke you have come to the wrong place however here is a good recipe for a cake: Ingredients 2-1/2 cups 2% milk 1 cup butter, cubed 8 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 3 eggs 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 2-2/3 cups all-purpose flour 2 cups sugar 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/2 teaspoon salt FILLING: 6 tablespoons butter, cubed 4 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped 2-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream GANACHE: 10 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 2/3 cup heavy whipping cream Directions In a large saucepan, cook the milk, butter and chocolate over low heat until melted. Remove from the heat; let stand for 10 minutes. Preheat oven to 325°. In a large bowl, beat eggs and vanilla; stir in chocolate mixture until smooth. Combine the flour, sugar, baking soda and salt; gradually add to chocolate mixture and mix well (batter will be thin). Transfer to three greased and floured 9-in. round baking pans. Bake 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely. For filling, in a small saucepan, melt butter and chocolate. Stir in confectioners' sugar and cream until smooth. For ganache, place chocolate in a small bowl. In a small saucepan, bring cream just to a boil. Pour over chocolate; whisk until smooth. Cool, stirring occasionally, until ganache reaches a spreading consistency. Place one cake layer on a serving plate; spread with half of the filling. Repeat layers. Top with remaining cake layer. Spread ganache over top and sides of cake. Store in the refrigerator. Yield: 16 servings.

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Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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Whats invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts

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There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

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why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

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Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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What do you call a black person riding a bicycle? A black person riding a bicycle.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool The tragic drowning of a quadrapalegic

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When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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