what do you call a kid in a wheelchair? . handicapped.

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What did the duck get for Christmas. A potato. Not really it got nothing because it's a duck

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There was once a boy named Swan, But then they built Autobahn.

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What do you call a 46 year old man with one eye 4'5 and has one arm coming out of his chest Steve

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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so if you need 20 dollars and you just kicked your cat how old is your mom. cake because you are a 666 member.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "i have aids."

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Knock knock? Who's there? Cancer Cancer who? After some time and various bouts of radiation and chemotherapy, he finally lost his life to the terrible disease.

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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roses are red violets are red everything is red who set my house on fire

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If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

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Gas prices are so high, I've had to resort to walking and riding my bike.

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why did the chicken cross the road. to get to the other side. but it didnt. ROADKILL

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish.

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whats the difference between virgin and a porn star?? A virgin hasn't got aids.

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What has three eyes, scales, seventeen stomachs, and can produce milk? Nothing. Nature has not yet evolved any animal to these specifications.

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why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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What has an orange t shirt A dick I lied about the shirt

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I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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