what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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What is the difference between a plum and an elephant? One is purple, and not an elephant.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

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What is worse the the Holocaust? Nothing

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

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What's worse than having sex with a woman who has been dead for 10 minutes? Having sex with a woman who has been alive for 10 minutes.

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What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

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What did the woman say just before she was stabbed eleven times in the chest thus killing her? Nothing, she had been gagged.

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Illumati Confirmed

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Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

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Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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DARK FACT: A ratchet black chick would say that was racist.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.

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Whats the difference between a field of corn and a dead body? The field of corn wasn't killed by severe blood loss and hemorrhaging after it was stabbed in the back, stomach and abdomen 27 times in 1987, where the escaped convicted serial killer buried it beside a river in Northern Dakota.

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10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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