There once was a man from Dundee. He got stung by an angry wasp. He put some Bactine on it. He lied down and took a rest He felt much better the next morning.

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Why did the guy die? He had a fatal heart attack.

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Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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What did the muffin say to the cup cake? nothing, muffins can't talk, and cup cakes can't hear.

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

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Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

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Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

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Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Me too.

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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Q. What does physiks sound to most of the people? A. There were two camels, one was green, how much does the sand weight when its dark?

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Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. The female body inspectors? No, the female bawdy inspectors.

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Knock knock whos there? A dead black man ... i farted

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Why is John single? Because women are materialistic.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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why was the boy sleeping in the basement? he was brought over from ethiopia to become a child sex slave and was now being help against his will in a basement

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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I was jaywalking when it hit me. You know, a car.

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I really want to wear my Christmas leggings Actually I lied about the leggings, they're tights I love anal

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Knock-knock? Who's there? I... I dunno I was planning on thinking of a joke before you said who's there, but I ran out of time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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