What's worse than getting tripped? Getting shot.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter anyway because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

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why was the black man forced to sit at the back of the bus ? it was a busy day.

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Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

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SCENE: A prirate walks into a bar with the wheel of the ship attached to his pants. BARTENDER: Doesn't that hurt? PIRATE: Aye! It drives me nuts.

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chirs

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

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roses are red, violets are violet.

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What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

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I'm hungry.

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What's flying and eats rocks? A flying rock eater

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Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

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Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

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a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

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what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

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What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

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How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

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What did the midget say to the leprechaun? Nothing.....midgets don't usually converse with leprechauns....and leprechauns aren't real.

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This is not a joke or is it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops