Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

TWATFROST HOLOCOSTME sOME MONEY TO GET A BOOB JOB HAHAHAHA BALOWJOB

Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake. One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?" "You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.

what did the bee do when bill tried to slap it it stung bill and died.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

What is worse then not being able to drink your vodka right away A black guy drinking for you

Why didnt jerry trip over a slug? Because jerry is an arabian and the atmosphere in arabi is to hot for a slug.

Why did Colussi miss 2 years of school? -Because he died

A priest was walking home from church one day when he found a young boy crouching naked in the bushes. The priest contacted local law enforcement authorities on his cell phone and proceeded home once they arrived.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

Yo mama so dirty she takes a shower every night

How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

What did winter say to summer? Nothing. Seasons are physically incapable of speaking because they are not living things. They are simply an idea made by humans to explain why the weather changes as the sun spins around the earth.

knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Why do many men find it difficult to make eye contact? Debilitating autism.

A bus with 11 passengers is making its final stops for the night. At main street it drops of 6 people and picks up 2, at broad it drops of 3 and picks up 4, at 3rd street it drops of 5 and picks up 1, and finally at 6th street it drops off 4 and picks up 0. How many people are still on the bus? 13 if you include the dead bodies in the back

What is the greatest lie ever? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

if your mother was put in a situation where she could either have sex with a man or a woman she would pick the woman

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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