How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

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A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer..... I'm going to rip the scalp off of your son and where it on my face to a Cherokee Sacrificial Ceremony The other lawyer was actually a lightbulb

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

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If 6 is afraid of 7, what is 7 afraid of? ...Chuck Norris.

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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What do you call two blacks on a bike? Two good friends having a good time.

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Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

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A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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What do you get when you stab a four year old in the chest 57 times A dead body

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Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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where did Lucy go when the bomb dropped? everywhere.

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* anti-punchline

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What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

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How do you know what time it is in the dark? Turn on the light and look at the clock.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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