What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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how do you fix a family? Someone gives in

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

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Why did the boy die? He got shot in the face repeatedly.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What is similar between a penguin and a newspaper? If you kill a penguin, then grind it up into a fine powder, then the penguin becomes a newspaper.

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A kid wanted to change the channel... One thing leads to another.

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Why did the fortune cookie taste bad? I forgot to take the wrapper off.

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What does a muslim do on a plane? Flies to his intended destination without causing a problem.

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What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

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Two people were playing Monopoly. One was a blonde and one was black. The blonde said, "your turn".

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Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

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What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

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I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

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What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

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An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was no oncoming traffic.

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What's the difference between white and black? White is Caucasian and black is African-American.

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why'd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops