- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

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What do you call a Black Priest? His title would probably be Reverend, and then his last name after it.

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what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

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was michael jackson black or white? how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie poop? the world will never know

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Q:Baby, baby, baby, oooh A:Thats what she said.

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How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

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What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

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whats the difference between ebola and a can of dead babies? i have ebola. this isnt funny at all.

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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no

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Why did the boy jump off a bridge? Because he saw it on tv

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

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I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

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How did the Mexican got into USA? Trough the border.

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A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

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Stephen Hawkings viewed porn as a child

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A blind guy walks into a bar because he can't see.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand hey! Got any guns

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A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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