Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

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why was the woman out of the kitchen, because she had to have sex with her husband in a bed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz he does what he wants.

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It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a truck.

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What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

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how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

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What's yellow, long, hard, and moves up and down? A banana in an elevator...

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

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How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

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i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

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Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

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Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

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Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

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A man walks outside on a sunny day. Since the sun was very bright, he put on a pair of sunglasses. While this was going on, nothing else really happened and he went on with his day as usual.

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im at school

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

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What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

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Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

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What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

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Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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Am I a cat? No, I am a human; cat's cannot type.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops