What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

Whats the difference between a Duck? One of its legs are both the same.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

Two muffins were in a microwave. One muffin said, 'It's getting hot in here." What did the other muffin say? Nothing, muffins can't talk.

How do you stop a bus? Throw a little child in front of it. If the driver is a loaf of bread, this phrase isn't rather important.

whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE!? YES I AM, AH! ARE YOU READY?! ARE YOU READY FOR LOVE?! The judge did not find the Elton John song worthy of negating the statuary rape charges and sentenced him to nine years in jail.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

people on this site vote for anti-jokes that make them laughed

how many people does it take to take over the world aperently just 1 me

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

What's worse than World War II? World War III.

What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

A man walked into a lampost. He hurt himself.

If life throws you melons, either catch them or get out of he way to avoid injury.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven stabbed his mother.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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