What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

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What did the munchy alzhemiers farmer say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators?

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What's worse than the Holocaust? People trying to be funny writing the same jokes over and over.

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What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the egg crossed the road? If X = chicken and C = the speed of light, then 2 to the power of the road which is 12 feet across times X/C = egg

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Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

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What's 10 + 3 x 22 ? Cake.

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What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

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Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

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What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

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why did the lady fall on the ground? The cord for the parachute was cut by her husband

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Whats he difference between a rock and a dead baby? I'm not spemding the rest of my natural life in an insane asylum for eating a rock!

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A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

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How do you give a women more freedom? Shoot her in the face with a shotgun.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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What do you get when you stab a four year old in the chest 57 times A dead body

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had previously driven over innocent civilians who were all constipated and had now caused a mild to extremely large shitstorm.

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How do you know what time it is in the dark? Turn on the light and look at the clock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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