- Anti Joke

I like pancakes. I like pancakes. We have no pancakes

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

Terrorist jokes make me explode with laughter.

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

kieran scott has a huge back

What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

If you were expecting an antijoke you have come to the wrong place however here is a good recipe for a cake: Ingredients 2-1/2 cups 2% milk 1 cup butter, cubed 8 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 3 eggs 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 2-2/3 cups all-purpose flour 2 cups sugar 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/2 teaspoon salt FILLING: 6 tablespoons butter, cubed 4 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped 2-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream GANACHE: 10 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 2/3 cup heavy whipping cream Directions In a large saucepan, cook the milk, butter and chocolate over low heat until melted. Remove from the heat; let stand for 10 minutes. Preheat oven to 325°. In a large bowl, beat eggs and vanilla; stir in chocolate mixture until smooth. Combine the flour, sugar, baking soda and salt; gradually add to chocolate mixture and mix well (batter will be thin). Transfer to three greased and floured 9-in. round baking pans. Bake 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely. For filling, in a small saucepan, melt butter and chocolate. Stir in confectioners' sugar and cream until smooth. For ganache, place chocolate in a small bowl. In a small saucepan, bring cream just to a boil. Pour over chocolate; whisk until smooth. Cool, stirring occasionally, until ganache reaches a spreading consistency. Place one cake layer on a serving plate; spread with half of the filling. Repeat layers. Top with remaining cake layer. Spread ganache over top and sides of cake. Store in the refrigerator. Yield: 16 servings.

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

In that case you are probably a bit of an outcast as most girls of your beauty are, you know, you are that kind of girl that feels weird because when she got/gets on the buss EVERYONE stares at her, but nobody dares to say anything, right? And when you are hanging out for a drink or something guys stare at you, and go like "nah" which means "Nah she is too good to want me" and starts hitting on your friends instead. Oh and you also get a lot of rude comments from guys "auto disqualifying themselves" like using complements they know will backfire like "Hey wanna fuck sugart1ts? They do this so they can go home with their ego intact thinking "Hey I was tough enough to hit on her, but she turned out to be a bitch! So does any of this sound familiar?

what do you call a black man drinking cool-aid? thirsty.

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

Do you know what my favorite rhetorical question is?

Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

What has three legs and herpes? A male prostitute.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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