A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

Knock Knock. Did someone outside the front door just say "Knock Knock"?

Why don't you play uno with Mexicans? Because they collect all the green cards.

What do you get when you mix a baby and a fork? An abortion.

Hey do you want to hear the joke about my d**k?? I cant tell it because it's to long

What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because Your mother said so. Now get a life and get off this website young fellas.

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

a black and a mexican are walking down the street, two cops look up to see this and immediately say "shit, this can't be good".

Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz he does what he wants.

It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

Old guitars sound like cat's guts

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her.

What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

A ginger kid and his 5 friends walk into a bar

What's yellow, long, hard, and moves up and down? A banana in an elevator...

Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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