You know how I felt about Nero, no way id ever date anyone but you, back then that is. Fine I will come along, I bet you left the base at "point zero" without the information he left, you have not changed a bit Seth, always too impulsive for your own good, but Nero was always like that and that, turned out, well damn. Tell me first, if you come get me, how much have you really changed mentally from the last time we met? You sincerely sound like a psychopath and I could use a shoulder to cry on rather than be escorted to some sick torture dungeon thing. I gather you are not far away, could you please get over here asap? I do not care about more than the standard code anymore, you have not changed much, except you are a deranged psychopath now, I get it, in your place I think id do the same, I have no idea how bad Nero was doing when you found him, and I sure as hell dont want to know.

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Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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the love boat

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

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Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

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Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

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fava beans

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What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

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when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

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What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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A street performer was sitting on a curb playing guitar when a black man walked up and put some money in the guitar case. The street performer nodded in appreciation of the man's donation and continued to play his instrument.

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Lol Nerochan, that was like totally awesome!

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Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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