What did the homeless man get for Christmas?... A warm meal, a shower, and a place to sleep courtesy of the local homeless unit.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What happens when you throw a midget off of a tall building? It dies and the people below get midget on them

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Some jokes rhyme, But this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the black man wash up on shore? He was on a boating trip, deep sea fishing, with some close friends from high school. About half of a mile off shore his ship crashed and sunk to the bottom of the ocean. Sadly, not everyone lived this through this tragic accident. This man was one of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar. Dyslexia is not funny. -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down +15

When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man cross the road? Because the light turned green

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's black and white and red all over? A bloody zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

2 + 2 = 4

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q:Which do you take out more...trash or recycle? A: Greenery

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A donkey walks into a supermarket and asks the cashier "Where are the potatoes?" The cashier replies "aisle 3" The donkey goes to aisle 3 And there are no potatoes

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Why did Frank have a big horse named Bubba? A: He was allergic to cats

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

sorry got to poo

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops